Happy Thanksgiving Friends! Today is the day that most of us have a laser focus on gratitude and many families share out loud exactly what they are grateful for. I love that tradition. Thanksgiving has always been my favorite holiday, but when thinking about writing another post on gratitude I couldn’t get Snoop Dogg out of my head. I know that sounds odd but hold on… During his Hollywood Star acceptance speech where most people rattle off a list of people who have helped them on their way to star status, Snoop Dogg pivoted. Instead of that traditional thank you speech he actually said he wanted to thank himself. I didn’t see it live, but I certainly saw all the headlines that followed. Snoop Dogg Thanks Himself While Receiving Hollywood Star the headlines read. I saw those big bold headlines and I cringed!
A few days later I actually watched the speech and I still wasn’t sure how I felt. It was kind of funny in a cheeky way. And it was bold in a brassy sort of way. But I struggled with it feeling a little arrogant. Was it really a good thing to publicly thank ourselves? What about in private? I wondered how many of us ever even do it then?
After giving it a little thought it seemed pretty logical to acknowledge our own efforts. To actually be proud of ourselves. After all, any amount of success comes with hard work. And in that moment I pivoted too. I loved the speech and decided that I would actually start doing the work to feel comfortable doing that too. While I do believe that no one is ever really self-made (there is always someone that helps you on your journey), I do believe that your success or lack thereof really does start and end with YOU.
So with that being said, during your “what I’m thankful for speech” this year, I encourage you to offer yourself a big thank you too. If that seems as difficult for you as it was for me, here are three things that you can do:
1. Make a list of all of your accomplishments-Which one stands out as the most challenging? Perhaps you wanted to give up at some point but you pushed through. It is easier (for me anyway) to feel good about the things that weren’t easy. I am always the most proud of the things that I initially failed at and had the courage to keep going before they actually worked out. If you struggle with the I don’t want to sound arrogant thing too this helps. We feel a little less braggy about things that at first humbled us.
2. Instead of focusing on your #goals think about the things that you once hoped for that are now a reality– I really don’t think we do enough of this. Think about all all of the things that used to be on your wishlist, vision board, or stuck in your head. When I think about the way my life is now I can’t help but think that I really have gotten all the things I used to hope for. Now I will admit that they didn’t always come right when I wished for them and most didn’t come easy. Some came to fruition after serious challenges and hard lessons, but looking back on the last decade I realize that the important things did indeed come to pass. Think about your old goals and give yourself credit for where you are now.
3. Practice thanking yourself… out loud – Find that encouraging family member or friend and practice sharing something that you are proud of. If you don’t feel comfortable doing it with another person just yet, use the mirror until you are more at ease. Either way it might feel awkward at first because so many of us are accustomed to downplaying our accomplishments. There might be the fear of sounding like we are bragging or not being humble, but cheering for yourself the way you do for others is actually a form of self-care. It’s about giving ourselves the same love and affection we so quickly dole out to others. If you practice it with someone you know genuinely wants the best for you, you may find that it isn’t as difficult as you once thought.
All of this actually reminds me of a quote on twitter that said we often shout about other people’s accomplishments and whisper about our own. I am simply encouraging you to use your voice when it comes to being proud of you. Stop whispering to yourself and be your own cheerleader too! This helps you to feel more confident and builds the stamina for you to keep doing the work that will get you closer to your dreams!
I’d love to hear what you want to thank yourself for this year.
Until Next Post,
xo Tonya Parker